Tessa's Secret Admirer (Chapter 7)
Chapter Seven: You in About Fifty Years
When Tessa saw the photos he had taken of her suspended in the shibari ropes, she was stunned. Her lover was an artist. She could hardly believe the woman in those pictures was her. Every knot, every loop of rope binding her body looked like an act of love. She loved how he could tie her up and use her so roughly, while treating her with such reverence and respect. She shared the photos with him. Of course she trusted him. He had earned that. She was on pins and needles all week. She knew everything was about to change. Or maybe nothing would change. Maybe their relationship would be exactly the same, with the exception of her being able to help with the dishes and find her own way up and down the stairs. When she imagined the moment of revelation, it was a sweet and soul-tingling thought, like an expectant mother thinking about seeing her newborn baby for the first time. The love was there already. All that was left was to see his face.
She’d decided to prolong the magic for as long as she could. When Friday came, and he picked her up at their usual spot, she wore the blindfold as she always did.
He helped her into his car and gave her a kiss. “Have you thought about how you want to do this?” he asked.
“I think we’ll know when the moment is right.”
“Agreed.” They were both a little quiet, thinking about the new turn their relationship was about to take.
“This has been best six weeks of my life,” Tessa mused.
“Same here. I love the way this all came together. The blindfold allowed us both to be ourselves, which is ironic, really. High school is a special kind of hell. Everyone’s forced to wear some kind of mask.”
“You’re right about that,” she told him. “I don’t know why we weren’t friends back then, but I know the distance between us was because we weren’t free to be ourselves.” Those days were over, though. They were free to be whoever they wanted now. She realized that the blindfold would become a crutch if she wore it much longer.
The weekend progressed much like the previous ones had. An intimate dinner, a movie carefully viewed from between the blinders, with her back pressed against her lover’s chest. And lots of sex. The sex was sweeter, quieter than usual, no less intense, but absent the accessories of handcuffs and ropes. The only thing they kept was the blindfold. They kissed and licked and sucked and fondled, words of endearment spilling from their lips like honey as their hands sought and found all the favorite pleasure points they had discovered during the past six weeks.
It wasn’t until Saturday night that they mentioned the blindfold again. They were spooning, enjoying the afterglow of an extended session of lovemaking. He held her close and she could feel his warm breath against her hair. “You can still change your mind. If you want more time, it’s okay with me.”
“Not a lot more time. Just... Can I enjoy the mystery for one more night?”
“Of course. Close your eyes for a minute. I’ll get up and remove the blackout shade. When the sun comes up, you’ll be able to roll over and see the man who loves you.”
She closed her eyes and pulled the covers over her head until she felt him slide back into bed behind her. His arms came around her again and she opened her eyes. Moonlight was streaming in the window. Without turning her head, she took a timid first look at the room where the most beautiful moments of her life had taken place. There wasn’t much she could see in the moonlight, at least not without looking around and taking the risk of identifying him before she was ready. There was a nightstand with a lamp and a glass of water on it. A couple of books were perched on the windowsill. A white cotton t-shirt folded neatly on top of the dresser. Within minutes she dozed off, blissfully certain that when she looked upon the face of the man who held her in his arms, her love for him would increase a thousandfold.
Meanwhile, the man behind her was wondering if she could possibly look at him without being disappointed. She’d never given him any indication that she liked him. Not that he could blame her. He nuzzled his face against her hair and prayed that this wasn’t the last night he would spend with her. It took him a couple of hours to fall asleep.
Tessa opened her eyes the next morning and smiled at the sunlight shining through the window. Today was the day she would learn the name of her soulmate. Today was the day she got to fall in love with his face as well as his heart and soul. A little morsel of trepidation worried its way into her mind. Last night she’d been so certain that his identity wouldn’t matter. But at night, in the darkness, he took her to a world where nothing else mattered, nothing else even existed except the two of them. Why had he been so worried that she wouldn’t like him?
He was still sleeping. His arm was draped heavily across her. That part of him was handsome. Muscular. Tan. His hand was laying against the sheet. A large, strong hand with long sensitive fingers. She already knew that from his lovemaking. She ran her own fingers along the back of his hand, contemplating how beautiful it was, and trying to gather the nerve to turn around and see the face that went with it. It took her a good ten minutes to turn around, doing it in a series of little movements, just a few degrees at a time with breaks in between to adjust to the idea of being a little closer to knowing. When she finally rolled over all the way and was facing him, she kept her eyes closed tight. She reached forward and touched his chest, taking in the familiar texture of the thatch of hair that covered his pecs. She knew him by touch, and she used those familiar sensations of him to calm herself as she gathered the strength to take her first look.
Finally, she opened her eyes a crack, getting a blurry peek at him through her lashes. She could only see an outline of shaggy brown hair and a broad shoulder over the top of the comforter. She willed herself to open her eyes all the way. She sucked in a breath and pulled herself up to a sitting position when she saw his face.
“Oh my god!” she whispered. She felt like she was suffocating and had to remind herself to exhale and then to breathe in again. She was stunned. If she had worn the blindfold ten more years, she wouldn’t have figured it out. Breathe, Tessa. Tears sprang to her eyes as the emotions of the last few weeks surged up and overwhelmed her. She swiped them away and drew her legs up to her chest, leaning back against the headboard to look at him. He was so goddamn handsome. And she had never noticed. How could she not have noticed? His eyes opened slowly and met hers. Suddenly he was wide awake. He sat up, a look of dismay on his face when he saw her tears.
“It’s okay, Mr. Boredom. This is a good cry.”
“Well Terri, how about I hold you until it passes?” She obligingly crawled into his arms. “I was afraid last night would be our last. I’m just glad you’re still here.”
She smiled through her tears. “Where else would I be?”
“You’re not disappointed?”
“Not even a little bit. Amazed.” Suddenly remembering her decade-long grudge, she gave him a playful swat. “Why did you call me Terri for all of senior year? And again at the reunion?” He sighed and looked out the window, remembering his first-ever teaching assignment.
He hadn’t even graduated college yet. It was supposed to be a semester-long student teaching gig, but less than two weeks in, his mentor developed complications in her pregnancy and had to go on bed rest. The district was low on funds and didn’t have a lot of options. With almost no orientation, he’d been promoted from student teacher to full-time English teacher. His students were all seniors, just three or four years younger than him. He’d done the best he could, but he was in a mile over his head.
“There’s no excuse for the way I treated you, Tessa. I don’t think I was breaking the law or violating school policy by being in love with you or going home and jacking off to you. But I knew it would be the end of my career if I betrayed myself in any way. My feelings for you were so strong I felt like everyone could tell. I still felt like a kid myself and I didn’t know how to handle it. So I compensated by acting like a total dick. I made it a point never to look directly at you. Pretending not to know your name was just another layer of self-preservation. At the time I didn’t realize how much that must have hurt you. You felt invisible already and all I did was make it worse.”
“If memory serves, I wrote some pretty hateful shit about you in my diary. I’m sorry about that.”
“Oh, I deserved it. But maybe you can understand my trepidation over the big reveal.”
“My childish grudge was no match for the powers of your seduction.”
“You had every right to be pissed off. I let you down, Tessa. If I’d been a better teacher, it might have helped with some of the issues you were going through. But I wasn’t there for you. I hope you can forgive me. I was very young and still learning my craft.”
“There’s nothing to forgive,” Tessa said, leaning forward to kiss him. “I understand why you had to hide your feelings. But why were you okay with giving me your phone number when you returned my diary?”
“Easy. You were a legal adult and not my student anymore. It certainly would have raised a few eyebrows in the faculty breakroom if people knew I was dating a recent graduate, but we wouldn’t have been doing anything wrong at that point.”
“And why did you call me Terri at the reunion?”
“I didn’t want to blow my cover.”
“It worked. I had no idea. Although I probably should have gotten a clue after you compared me to Ophelia.”
He laughed. “Yeah, the minute that came out of my mouth, I realized how much I sounded just like Mr. Boredom. I’m glad you didn’t notice.”
“I guess I should apologize for that insulting nickname.”
“It stuck. The students at Woodside have been calling me that for ten years now. But it started with you.”
Tessa laughed. “I guess I did leave a legacy of some sort at that place. I’m sorry you’ve been stuck with it for so long.”
He smiled. “I’m not. I think of you every time someone calls me that. Besides, there was a karmic booby trap you didn’t know about at the time. If things go according to plan, you’ll be Mrs. Boredom someday.”
“I certainly hope so,” she said, giving him an adoring smile. “And who told you where to send the flowers?”
“The person who sold them to me. Candace. Actually, she wouldn’t give me your address. She said she knew where you lived and would see that you got them.”
She climbed on top of him and ran her fingers through his hair. “You were wrong about something.”
“I’m sure I’ve been wrong about many things. But what are you referring to?”
“You said that we only get one first time. But we get two. Won’t it feel so new the first time we make love while we’re looking at each other?”
He smiled, dimples appearing on each cheek. How had she never noticed how blue his eyes were?
“Actually, it’s felt new every time for me.”
Now that the blindfold was gone, Tessa couldn’t take her eyes off him. He was so handsome, so sweet, so kind. And he always had been. His cock was hard, pressing right against her wet pussy. She shifted a little, taking him inside her, delighting in this new joy of looking at him while they fucked. Waves of pleasure raced through her, as her pussy clenched and quivered around his throbbing cock. Suddenly she was overcome with desire and started riding him hard and fast. “Jared... Jared,” she murmured. Now that she had a name, the joy of saying it overwhelmed her and it spilled from her lips, again and again.
She picked up speed, her hips moving at a rapid pace as she slid up and down over the length of his shaft. His hands reached up to lovingly squeeze her breasts, setting her nipples on fire with his touch. “Oh, I love you!” she cried out, as the first orgasm of the day worked its way through her body, starting between her legs and working its way up her spine and out through the top of her head.
As she came down from her climax, she gazed into his eyes. He was so beautiful, so perfect. The reality was so much better than the fantasy. It was a reality that promised an endless number of tomorrows, and night after splendorous night in his loving arms. She realized how much of his love she had been missing out on because of the blindfold, how much love he could show without saying a word, just speaking through his eyes. She’d caught a glimpse of it when she’d seen the shibari photos, seeing herself for the first time the way he saw her.
They were still moving together, their bodies joined in a rhythmic dance that sealed their love and promises to each other. Another orgasm raced through her body. His cock felt so good inside her, but what felt even better was just... looking at him. She came again and again. It felt like she was swimming around inside his soul. He cried out as the moment of his release got closer, and when it arrived, their eyes were locked, wordless I-love-yous flowing between them like honey.
When the climax was over she climbed off and cuddled up to him, still gazing wondrously at his face. “Love at first sight,” she murmured. “I never truly saw you before. Not the real you.”
“It was love at first sight for me too,” he told her. “I’m glad we’re finally on the same page.”
“We should start a new diary,” she told him. “The diary of us. We’ll both write about all the fun we have together including the kinky stuff.”
“And we’ll keep it locked away for our grandchildren to find after we’re dead.”
Tessa smiled, thinking about how many volumes that book would be if she got her wish. The future was all theirs. She had never felt so happy. They spent a leisurely morning together, preparing breakfast, making love again, talking and sharing memories, now that Tessa knew what memories they shared. Tessa got a tour of the house and yard. “Feel free to rearrange the landscaping to suit your taste,” he told her. “Of course, you can re-decorate the inside of the house too, but I figured you would want to start outside.”
“It sounds like you’re inviting me to move in.”
“Let’s go get your stuff.”
“I can’t do it today. It’s Sunday. I have a thing this afternoon. But you can come with.”
“So where are we going?”
“There’s another man in my life. I’ve known him almost exactly as long as I’ve known you.”
“Should I be jealous?”
“No. I think you’ll like him. His name’s Everett. He reminds me of you in about fifty years.”